Stress and Christmas

I am too stressed to talk politics so here's a cross-section of my brain right now.

So here we are just a few weeks till x-mas and I am feeling the holiday stress in full force. My Grandmother came out from New York to visit before Thanksgiving and that was the beginning of stress central. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a normal family, but where is the fun in that? Not having a job still eats at me on a regular basis, while what I am doing now has me out of the house and is quite fulfilling it is not a paying job and can only fill my basic needs.

I find myself in a weird rut, I am pretty happy in my current situation but there is still that nagging feeling that I am 30 and still haven't found a real direction or purpose for my existence I am doing my best to put it in God's hands and wait for his signal but oh is it hard. I just hope I didn't miss the train...