Saturday, February 14, 2009

Botched again

As usual my attempts to squish drama has led to more drama. So let it be known you can't tuck it away and hope it disappears. It overloads and explodes. So I am going with a new approach; by the issue. Address each thing individually while it's small and don't let it build up.

I am way more involved in my job than others. For one I live at my job, which makes getting away difficult. Second, I am invested personally. While other want to see their employer thrive so they can get a raise, I want to see the boys I take care of thrive so they can be strong positive members of society, unlike their paternal DNA donor who is a wife beating aye-hole. Lastly like others I am reliant on job. If the rent doesn't get paid I will be homeless as well as out of a job.

What all this means is I have to handle myself better. I have to deal with my issues constructively and do it all under the watchful eyes of small children who soak up everything the see hear and experience. And while my boss/roomate/close friend can be frustrating at times, those moments are way outnumbered by the good times we have, and as long as I keep edging foward I can take the boys and her with me

I am doing everything I can to live my life better. I am really trying to keep my prayers going, reading my Bible, trying to be a good example and supportive to my friends and family. But sometimes I feel fate is working against me. That's probably the enemy doing his thing and I need to fix that.

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